THIS IS A NEW PAGE IN YOUR LIFE!
HOW TO FIX YOUR LIFE by m.s. wardrip
CHAPTER ONE
Earthquakes and Fault Lines
One of the first things I learned in fixing my life was to let go of any notion I had about blaming others for my life being messed up. I had a real problem with this. I “bad-mouthed” a lot of people. It still takes constant awareness to watch out for putting the blame on somebody. The way to do this is to take all the blame ourselves, but at the same time, hold ourselves blameless. It’s nobody’s fault! Things happen. People do things. Accept it and just know that life is full of people’s actions. It’s when we feel hurt, rejected, picked on, neglected, ignored, targeted, bullied, misunderstood, not appreciated, paranoid, scared or find ourselves living in fear that we get into trouble. All those things are reactions to things that happened or things that people did. It really is all about how we react to things that happen. When we just say, “Well, this or that happened and so, now, how am I going to react?”, we are asking the right question. We must also give the right answer in order to be happy about it. So, what is the right answer? The right answer is something that makes our life better, something that is just and creates true happiness in our life. Revenge is not the answer. Hate is not the answer. Ignoring it does not make it go away. Striking back only makes things worse. Protecting yourself is the right thing to do. Protect yourself by choosing how to react in advance. No matter what happens, we need to have a plan that works already in place. We need to stop and think before we act in every situation. When something happens or someone does something, stop and think, “How can I be happy with this? Truly happy.” What is great about stopping and asking this question is this: You know the answer. Only you know how to be happy inside. Do not let the outside things that happen spoil your happiness. Be happy inside and those uncomfortable things that happen will dissolve. You are in charge here. Choose the response that is in keeping with living the good life. Fix your life now so you can now live the good life.
The reasons I felt like I had to fix my life are many. I’m sure you also have many reasons. Reasons are like excuses sometimes. Sometimes we don’t fix something and we say there is a reason for that and that’s our excuse. Sometimes we do fix things and use reasons as an excuse to do so. Let’s use this excuse now as a reason to fix our life… the reason is… because nobody else is going to fix it for you, that’s what! Everyone has their own life to deal with and unfortunately the ‘life fixers’ can't just go around repairing everyone that comes along. So, in a profound way, this is a do-it-yourself course. I’m just here to guide you through the process. You will see results if you go along. Just take your time, no hurry, no deadline to meet. You may want to go back over parts of this at times just to make sure you got it, what the lesson was trying to teach you.
One thing we need to do right here and right now is ‘call yourself out’. Say to yourself, “Hey, you in there! That’s right, I’m talking to you! You come out here right now! This is important and you are going to listen to me!”
Once you’ve gotten your attention, say this to yourself, “Listen up! I love me (you) and I want the best for me. I have within me the ability to have a happy, wonderful and meaningful life. I am going to listen to me, now that I know what to say to me. With the help of this little book I am fixing my life. I am fixing me. I am fixing me because I need fixing and I’m fixing me because no one else can or will. It is up to me and I am doing the fixing. So prepare for repair!”
Now, that we are all aware of who is in charge…
(fill in the blank) Who is in charge? ________________________ is in charge, that’s who! Now, we can warm up with some exercises.
First, let’s start with the easy stuff. Okay, my life is screwed up because I ______________________________(This can be anything! No one else has to see it and if you are afraid someone might see it and that it might embarrass, incriminate, implicate or injure you in some other way, well, just write it on another piece of paper and then throw it away. It is important that you write it down though!)
Here is an example: (Not the reasons my life was screwed up! That’s private information!, This is just an example of what it could be for someone.)
Okay, my life is screwed up because I… Listened to the wrong person and believed them, because I didn’t do what I should have growing up, because I got in with the wrong crowd, because I started to smoke, because I started to drink, because I started doing drugs, because I started to steal, because I started to be experiment with sex too young, because I cheated people, because I cheated on people, because I’m a criminal, because I have no conscious, because I don’t love God and I’m not sure there is one or if He loves me, because I lied, because I broke every rule there is and then some, because you can’t trust me, because I did damage to loved ones, because I didn’t feel like I was worth anything and couldn’t do what everyone else could do, because I wasn’t appreciated, because I wasn’t loved, because I got all the wrong breaks, because I didn’t get any breaks, because I don’t have enough money, friends or influence, because I was used and abused, because I was always blamed, because I’m not smart enough, because I don’t look good enough, because I don’t have the willpower, because I don’t have enough faith in myself, because I don’t really have faith in anything and because I’m a failure, always have been and always will be and nobody really cares anyway. Because I’m me, because I am broke and because I need fixing.
Now, look at that list. Read it. Take a real good look at it. Ask yourself, “Is all that true? Is it really true? Is it fact or is it fiction… am I just making up stuff to whine about, to bitch about, to complain about, to vent about… as an excuse to blame my shortcomings on ?Is all this stuff the truth or is some of this stuff a lie? It does NOT matter! It does NOT matter. Self, do you hear me? It does NOT matter! This list does not matter because what I’m doing with it right this very second, is tearing it up, burning it, trashing it, throwing it out the window, blasting it into the past where it belongs to never be brought up again ever! Never! Not to be thought about, revisited, discussed, pondered, investigated, studied, questioned, prayed about, cursed or stored anywhere. Not in this lifetime! Not now, not tomorrow, not day after tomorrow and I repeat, NEVER! The list is history. Kaput! Final! Finis! Finished. Over. Done with and gone! Forever out of my mind. Forever out of my life.
This is an Earthquake. The weakness that caused the earthquake is called the fault line and this is nature’s way of realigning, readjusting, reshaping the Earth. When we have Earthquakes in our lives along these weak fault lines, we are realigning, readjusting, reshaping… fixing ourselves.
This is an internal cleansing of my life. This is a system-restore of my thought. This frees up disk space on my brain, heart and soul. Now that all that stuff is gone, it’s time to reboot. Earthquakes move along fault lines and sometimes cause big cracks that go way down deep below the surface. One can fill these cracks with something. It’s time to fill the empty space that’s left with good stuff. Good Stuff that we deserve to have there instead. Later we will recall the past but for a different reason, greater understanding.
When Earthquakes erupt again (and they will!) I fill the cracks with that healing cure… love, self-respect, self esteem, confidence, strength and bravery in knowing for certain that I am doing the right thing. It’s time to input data. This data is fine. It’s my kind of data! The good stuff!
Let it shake, rattle and roll! I just walk over to the crack and fill it up to the brim with good stuff and then smile and skip happily right on over it. Forgive and forget.
If you made a mistake, forgive yourself and start over.
If someone else made a mistake, forgive them and start over.
Your life is now 75% fixed.